Meet My New Mascot, Edmond, the Squildo from Free Range Silicone

So, with all these tentacles around, it’s about bloody time I have a mascot, right? Well, meet Edmond, my Squildo from Free Range Silicone. And before you ask, yes, my husband has met Edmond. Eddie’s going to be hanging around my office, so I kind of had to show him to hubby. He would have seen him eventually anyway. (For those who have no idea what I’m rambling on about: I have tentacle dildos, loads of them, and I’m too chicken to introduce them to hubby yet, for various reasons that can turn into a very long story, very quickly. Moving on…)

Since I’m doing my office in a steampunk style (pictures to come whenever we get the house and I’m able to fix it up to my liking), I asked for something in that style and got a gorgeous Golden Sparklefuck Squildo in metallic gold and black with little specks of sparkly glitter. Isn’t he a pretty boy? (And yes, I am going to refer to my Squildo as “he” and not “it”. I know it’s best not to personify sex toys but, if Edmond is going to be my mascot, it’s going to be weird not to refer to him as “he” instead of “it”.)

Free Range Silicone is a group of interdisciplinary artists that specialize in crafting hand-made, high quality, body-safe silicone sex toys. In other words, they’re my kind of people! Their designs are very fun and creative, and they take commissions. If you have a specific toy you want made and know the shape, colors, etc., you can set up a consultation with them to get it made. Yep, they do custom commissions, and that’s how Edmond was born. A Squildo like him will run you about $145.

Edmond came vacuum-sealed in plastic with some other goodies that I’ll be making into jewelry (pics to come later), and a simple paper tag that reads, “This Free Range Silicone toy is hand made and unique! It is made of platinum-cured silicone, and can be cleaned with any body friendly and NON-abrasive soap. Boil it often to remove contaminants (anything you can smell). We recommend water and plant-based lubricants. Avoid petroleum-based products and radiation.”

So, there are your care instructions. Boiling should be about 5 minutes. I’d like to add a warning to not use silicone-based lubricants on silicone toys. Also, you can wipe it down with a 10% bleach solution and rinse it well. Make sure to let it air dry properly before storing. It can a little difficult to clean and dry between the tentacles.

Measurements

• Total Length: ~11”
• Tentacle Length: longest tentacle ~ 4.5”
• Length Past Eyes: ~ 5.5”
• Shaft Circumference: ~ 4.5”
• Shaft Diameter: ~ 1.42”

Texture/Density

My Squildo, Edmond, has a very glossy finish to him. And, although he’s speckled with little sparkly bits of glitter, I can’t feel them. They’re in the silicone just enough to be seen without being felt. The glitter glows under UV light!

The head is pronounced and has a bit of a pre-cum drip at the tip. Squiggly veins line each side of the shaft, down to the bulbous eyes right above the tentacles. There are some gently imprinted suckers on the tentacles, and some of them have small drips at the end, which make them look sort of slimy.

Edmond is fairly plush. I can squish and squeeze his shaft, and even bend it a little. Of course, his tentacles are very wiggly yet firm. Think of them as a little firmer than gummi worms. They bend very easily, and wiggle and jiggle with every movement.

Playtime with Edmond

Well, the first thing I thought about was to gather his tentacles, lube them up, and see if I could insert them. Since they don’t come out to the same length when gathered, and they’re wavy, it’s rather difficult to get them all in me at once. Getting the middle ones in, and having the others wriggle over me is an interesting feeling; not very filling, but interesting.

So, since I sort of failed with that, I’ve been sticking to using the phallic end. The curve and the lip on the head are great for g-spot stimulation. The only thing I have to complain about is it he can be a slippery little fellow when wet. I usually grab his eyes or gather his tentacles and hold onto those.

Also, since Edmond is one of the smaller dildos that I have, he’s great for anal. Most g-spot toys are good for prostate stimulation, too. I haven’t tried it out on my husband, and I’m figuring I’ll weird him out if I ask, but I’m willing to bet it the Squildo would be great for prostate stimulation.

Opinion

Alright, so it was a little weird to actually stick a silicone critter in myself for the first time. (Please note that I do not endorse the use of real creatures for sexual means.) However, I knew what I was getting into when I ordered this bad boy. And, somehow, my brain concocted some sort of strange fantasy with penis squid coming after every my every orifice while I was playing with my Squildo the first time. Lots of Squildo, all after a chance to get some action. I rather like the idea of that much attention.

Anyway, Free Range Silicone did a great job on Edmond, and I just know he’ll look awesome in my office! He’s going to be my review buddy for quite a long time. Many thanks to Free Range Silicone for my shiny, sexy, little friend!

Pomegranate Raspberry EOS Shave Cream

Evolution of Smooth’s Pomegranate Raspberry Shave Cream is non-foaming cream designed to be moisturizing enough to shave wet or dry. EOS does not test on animals, and you can rest assured that this cream is free of anima by-products and parabens. It’s made with oat, aloe, shea butter, and vitamins E and C to provide a close shave that will leave you soft and smooth.

Well, that sounded like a pretty good deal. And, seeing as I needed some shave cream and I could get it free with my EdenPoints that I had saved up, I decided to go for it. What did I have to lose?

Packaging

This came in a plain box from EdenFantasys, no company name or indication of the contents anywhere to be found. It was nestled in some butcher paper and sealed in a plastic baggie along with some other bath & beauty products I had ordered.

The container is made entirely from #7 plastic and is printed with a message that good things happen to those who recycle. The container also states the company address and ingredients, along with a blurb about the product. This has not been tested on animals, and is paraben-free and free from animal byproducts. Also, there’s an expiration date printed on that bottom.

There are some decorative indentations in the container that make it easier to hold onto when wet. The surface has a sort of satin finish to it, and the indentations definitely were a good idea. Also, the top of the pump is embossed with the EOS logo to help prevent finger slippage. To prevent any accidental mess, there’s a plastic cap over the pump.

Ingredients

water, mineral oil, glycerin, stearic acid, glyceryl stearate, gluconolactone, triethanolamine, cetyl alcohol, petrolatum, sodium benzoate, dimethicone, glycol stearate, titanium dioxide (C177891), magnesium aluminum silicate, carbomer, disodium EDTA, butyrospermum parkii (shea butter) avena sativa (oat) kernel extract, aloe barbadensis leaf extract, ascorbyl palmitate, tocopherol acetate, propylene glycol, hexyl cinnamal, linalool, butyphenyl methylpropional, red 40 (C116035), yellow 6 (C115985)

The EWG Cosmetics Database rates this shave cream a level 5 moderate hazard with limited data. There are high concerns for endocrine disruption, irritation, and organ system toxicity (non-reproductive). Moderate concerns include biochemical or cellular level changes, and ingredient contamination concerns. There are low concerns for cancer and ecotoxicology. However, a decent amount of the ingredients listed on the EWG page don’t add up to what’s printed on my container. I’m wondering why they have parabens listed, when they’re not listed on the container. So… you can check out the individual ingredients by clicking on the green text, and make the decisions for yourself.

From what I’ve found, there are some ingredients that could cause irritation. So, this is definitely not for those with sensitive skin. Also, the synthetic scent ingredient butyphenyl methylpropional, aka Lilial, scores a level 7 hazard level and has allergy, contact dermatitis, bioaccumulation, organ system toxicity, and endocrine disruption concerns.

Scent

It’s a very perfume-y, sweet mixture of the typical artificial smells of raspberry and pomegranate. Really, it smells a lot like a raspberry body spray that I had when I was younger.

The scent is actually strong enough to penetrate the plastic container that it’s in. I don’t even have to take the cap off to smell it. Those who are sensitive to strong scents will want to skip this one.

After removing it, there’s a decent amount of the scent left on my skin, but it’s more subtle than right out of the container. That fades to a barely noticeable scent within a few hours.

Consistency / Texture / Color

The consistency and texture is similar to that of lotion, and will thin due to body warmth and/or water. It doesn’t foam or lather. I have no idea why the product page on EF says “Shaving Foam by Evolution of Smooth”. It’s definitely not a foam; it’s a cream, and says so in large font on the container.

If spread on dry, this stuff will not just rinse off. I have to rub my skin under running water to get it to come off. However, if used for a wet shave it’ll rinse right off, possibly before you finish shaving.

Experience

Wet Shave

Depending on how wet the area is that I’m applying it to, this can be tricky. If my legs are too wet, it goes on watery thin, when I spread it. It will run off my skin and will rinse off easily when it’s like this. So, I have to be careful not to get too wet or I’ll have to fool with reapplication. I generally just splash my legs a bit, turn off the shower, and apply. It’s just too much of an aggravation, if I don’t, and I always have to use more than what’s recommended.

At least my razor doesn’t clog this way. My legs feel nice and smooth after, with no greasy feeling, and it’s decently moisturizing. I have rather dry legs, and have to apply lotion after anyway.

Dry Shave

If I decide to use this to dry shave, this clogs my razor to the point that I just have to dispose of it after one use. No amount of rinsing it under hot water will unclog it. I’ll get done with one leg, and it’ll be half clogged, then struggle to get my second leg done before it just gets too clogged on me. And yes, that’s with having a cup of warm water next to me to swish and clean the razor out.

The first time I did it, I used too thin of a layer (the recommended amount) and was all itchy with razor bumps. A thicker application helps with that, but it also clogs the razor. Still, if I use more, I end up nice and smooth with no greasy feeling after. I usually give my legs a rinse in the shower real quick or wipe them with a wet paper towel to remove any residue or hair bits. If I try to rub in the little bit leftover from shaving, my skin just won’t absorb it. So, a quick cleaning is always needed.

I think this would be better suited to just a quick pit shave, when there’s no time for a shower. Shaving my legs dry with this just isn’t the best idea, but it works in a pinch.

Also, I would NOT use this to dry shave my pubic area. That would just be a disaster waiting to happen.

Opinion

If I ignore the things in the ingredient list that make me uncomfortable, then it’s an okay shave cream, but not something I’d buy again. This smell is nice, but could be overwhelming for some. Plus, the ingredients are certainly not meant for those with sensitive skin. If you generally get razor bumps, I wouldn’t expect this to solve your problem. One of the main things that I find annoying with this is how difficult it is to get the right amount of it on my skin to where it won’t just rinse right off or be too much and clog my razor.

Review of the Darque Wetlook Bustier by Coquette

The moment I saw the Darque Wetlook Bustier by Coquette come up for sale at EdenFantasys, I came down with gimme-gimme syndrome. Good thing I had some gift cards floating around and the fact that they’re always running sales. The beauty of this wetlook lingerie is that it’s not PVC or latex –that means no smells, phthalates (from PVC), or allergies to worry about – but gives you the perfect illusion of that sleek, sexy, smooth look.

Before I get too far into the review, it’s probably best to state what is/isn’t included with this item, since Coquette has quite a few of their items on the model in the product photo. You only get the bustier with the detachable garter straps. All of the other items are sold separately, and mix and match well with the other items in Coquette’s Darque line.

If you would like all of the items to complete the look, you can click any of the images below to go the respective product page.

Packaging

EdenFantasys always ships discreetly. My items came in a standard USPS Priority shipping box. No information about the contents was written on the box, and the return address said “Web Merchants”.

The packaging is pretty simple. Inside a sealed cellophane bag is the bustier on a clear plastic hanger with the company name on it. A tag featuring three images of the product model, the UPC code, manufacturer’s site address, and cleaning instructions is attached to the bustier via a very small black safety pin. Next to the cleaning/care symbols on the tag, there’s a little green Der Grüne Punkt symbol. This means that the manufacturer has complied with the German Packaging Ordinance to avoid or reduce packaging waste and promote the protection of natural resources.

Material

80% Nylon, 20% Spandex

It’s a very stretchy material with a slight drag to the side with the shiny wet look to it. If you’ve ever seen metallic swimsuits, the material is very similar. The inside lining is very soft in the cups, and slightly less soft in the rest of the bustier. There’s also an elastic band around the waistline, which is soft yet lightly textured. The material does breath, but it could become a little warm for some.

The straps of the garters have a texture on the outside of them that prevents the adjustment buckle from slipping.

Size

Due to my measurements, I chose a Small. This item is available in sizes Small, Medium, and Large. A full size chart can be viewed by clicking here.

Bustier Measurements Laid Open Flat

• Halter Strap Length: 34”
• Halter Strap Length Stretched to Max: 45”
• Bust: 27”
• Waist: 23”
• Hips: 30.5”
• Length of Bustier Side: 13”
• Distance from Bottom of Cup to Edge of Bustier: 10”
• Cup Length (Measured with Tape Laid in Cup): 5”
• Cup Width (Measured with Tape Laid in Cup): 6.5”
• Cup Size Estimate: I’d say it’s probably between a B-C. It should accommodate up to a D, but anyone under a B is going to have a pretty good gap.

Garter Measurements

• Length (Min): 4”
• Length (Max): 7”
• Length Stretched to Max: 10”

My Mesurements

• Bust: 33"
• Cups: A-B, depending on brand, but usually 32B
• Waist: 23"
• Hips: 34"
• Height: 5’1"
• Length from Shoulder to Hip: 16.5”
• Weight: 98lbs

Design / Construction

This is your typical bustier, with a little extra flair. Instead of the typical bra straps, this has halter-style straps. The fabric that covers the lightly-padded cups has a slight twist to it, which I find rather interesting. It actually isn’t secured down. Depending on how busty you are – meaning how much you’re going to make the fabric of the bust stretch – you might be able to hide a condom or some money in there. Of course, if the material is stretched too tight, you’ll be able to make out an outline of whatever you’re trying to carry concealed.

There are no underwires in the cups, and the boning is plastic. There are 11 pieces of plastic boning, which help to keep the bustier’s shape. However, if you have a little tummy pudge, it’s probably going to show a little. In the middle of the bustier are two zigzag lines. These hold a rather wide band of elastic around the middle. This provides some extra stability for the boning, and seems to keep it from bowing when I sit. I’ve had issues with other bustiers/corsets doing that, so it’s nice not to have that happen with this one. Also, if I try to bend over, the boning bows in towards my stomach.

There are two lines of eyes for the hook-and-eye closure in the back. This gives about an inch more tightness, when hooked to the innermost line of eyes.

Just ignore the weird amber coloring. I think it had something to do with the material reflecting the overhead light.

The garters are both adjustable and removable. You don’t have to wear them with the bustier. They attach via loops at the bottom edge of the bustier. Since the loops are tight, and the hooks of the garters have a little nub at the end, you don’t have to worry about them slipping loose. They’re your typical garters with the little rubber button and metal loop. There’s a ribbon on either side to disguise where they attach to stockings.

Everything on the bustier is well-made. My only problem is the garters. Although it can’t be seen during wear, the loop of the strap which is sewn over to hold the metal part of the garter, is somewhat fuzzy looking on three out of four of the garters. As you can see from the image above, that’s definitely not noticeable during wear.

Fit / Wear

Done up on the innermost row of eyes, this bustier fits me perfectly. The halter top helps accentuate what cleavage I have, but it does make a rather large bow. This can either be cute or obnoxious, depending on your tastes. Since the straps are entirely the wet look finish (the fabric is sewn into a tube, so the inner fabric doesn’t show), it makes it a little difficult to tie the bow, due to the drag of the material. It’s sort of like trying to tie a bow with latex; it just wants to stick to itself. Personally, I just tie the straps and let them hang. They stick to each other well enough that I don’t even have to worry about the bow.

Although the garters are adjustable and stretchy, you may have problems with them, if you’re over 5’1”. I had to adjust them to the longest lengths to get them to reach my stockings. Of course, that pair is a little short on me, so that could be part of the problem.

In the last picture, you can see that I’ve paired this with the Wetlook Gathered Skirt. I like the look of it underneath the bustier, but to have it on top when using the garters just looks weird. If you’re going to be using the garters, stay away from anything stretchy that will show the garters, boning, and edge of the bustier. This is coming from someone rather short, though. That being said, the bustier might not be as long on others, and you might be able to get away with it.

This is a very comfortable bustier. The boning doesn’t poke me, nor does the elastic band inside bother me. I’ve found nothing itchy or uncomfortable. Those who sweat easily may find themselves getting a little warm in this, though.

Cleaning / Care

Hand wash only, and hang to dry. Do not put this in the washer and dryer. You WILL regret it. I did that to a wetlook thong, and now the wet look coating on the fabric is all blotchy and flaking off. Do not use an iron on this either.

Storage

Coquette included a plastic hanger in the packaging, which is perfect for storage. It has a number of notches in it to hold onto the garment loops that are located in the armpits of this item. Keep it hanging in a closet. I would not leave this in direct sunlight.

You can keep the garters in the little pouch that they came in, and re-pin them to one of the bustier’s garment loops.

Opinion

I love my Wetlook Bustier! It’s insanely sexy, fits well, and is comfortable and easy to care for. Okay, so, the garters are just a tad messy. That’s easily remedied with a pair of scissors. If you’re looking for a sexy piece that can mix and match with lots of items to create various looks, this is a must have! Just a small warning for those who are small-busted, you may need some extra padding. I just barely fill it out.

Review of the Luv-U-Lounge

Ok, it really shouldn’t be a secret that I adore my Luv-U-Lounge. I jabber about it enough in my “Masturbation Diaries” posts. CalExotics toys may not have the highest ranking on my list, but the Luv-U-Lounge is definitely one of my favorite sex toys now.

What you get:

• 1 inflatable PVC lounge with 6 velcro cuffs (53”x 30”)
• 1 inflatable pillow insert with thrusting mechanism (requires 8 C batteries, not included)
• 1 Futurotic® dong (requires 1 AA battery) (5.5”x 1.5”)
• 1 cap to the dong to use as a vibe separate from the lounge
• 1 wireless remote control (requires 1 12volt N battery, included)
• 1 remote controlled bullet vibe (requires 2 AA batteries, not included)
• 1 hand inflation pump with hose and nozzle adapters
• 1 really really pink storage bag
• 1 patch kit that says it’s for patching a sex doll O_o

I’ve used this much more on my own than as a couple’s toy. I just can’t get relaxed enough to have it feel good to have the Futurotic® dong ramming my back door while I’ve got my hubby in me. Every time I get the dong in, hubby’s penis twitches and then my muscles twitch and everything clenches. That makes it difficult to get the dong in, and he just doesn’t give me enough time to relax and get used to another dick being in me. And, every time I get him in, the dong pops out. I guess because I’m so little, I can only hold so much dick in me at once. Plus, he’s huge (6’5”) and it’s hard to fit us both on the Luv-U-Lounge at the right angle for me to get two dicks in. If the backrest was just a little further back, I think we’d be set.

It’s actually really funny to see him on the Luv-U-Lounge with the thrusting dong insert. It’s like he’s having a penis sword fight with the lounge! lmao It took pretty much everything I had not to laugh my butt off the first time I saw it. It looked a little something like this –> Getting two dicks in me and thrusting without error has proven insanely difficult. –_-; It’s really not as easy as you’d think. And does the lounge the guy is sitting on look different than the actual lounge, or is it just me? O_o It doesn’t look like the back rest goes up as far on the one he’s sitting on. And, somehow, it’s shinier. My Luv-U-Lounge has a matte finish like the pic below the couple…

Altogether, there are 6 velcro cuffs to strap your lover into the Luv-U-Lounge with. They’re very easy to use. I’ve strapped myself in before while I had the Luv-U-Lounge set up next to the mirrored closet doors. (I wanted to watch, ok?) You can also use these to keep your partner from escaping the double-penetration.

Or, if you feel like teasing the hell out of your lover, you could strap them into the Luv-U-Lounge and let the dong go at them for a while and/or click it on/off while in another room. Or you could just tease them yourself. Your choice.

The dong is controlled remotely and can be turned on/off from pretty much anywhere in our little apartment. Which means hubby can strap me in, leave the room, and tease me by turning the thrusting on/off until I get really frustrated, tip the whole lounge over, and get stuck like a little turtle that’s been flipped over. :p

It takes 1 AA battery if you’d like to turn it into a vibrator. I prefer not to. I don’t really need it to vibrate when it’s penetrating me. Plus, you can’t turn it off when it’s hooked up to the thrusting mechanism, so the battery wears down quickly. I suppose if I’d use it as a separate vibe with the little cap that was included, I’d want it to vibrate, though. The vibration level is moderate, about a 3/5.

There’s also a 3 speed remote bullet vibe. It’s nothing that special. Just your basic 3-speeder. Average speed and noise levels. As for using the Luv-U-Lounge on my own:

I’ve pretty much been every which way on the Luv-U-Lounge by now. I’ve lounged normally and let it fuck me vaginally. I’ve laid sort of doggy style with part of my torso hanging over the head rest while it fucks me from behind. I’ve used the pillow insert by itself to straddle for both anal and vaginal. I’ve used it inserted backwards on the lounge so I could splay out on the bed for anal and vaginal. I’ve used it with an extra vibe on my clit and and extra dildo in me. Etc…etc…

Alright, so the Luv-U-Lounge is my stud, ok? :p If hubby had to do me as much as this thing has, he’d never have the energy to go to work. Other uses:

Hubby uses it like one of those video game chairs for when he’s playing Mario Galaxy 2.

Assembly:

• Screw in the hose to the black and yellow paddle-style hand inflation device to the “inflate” hole and assemble the tip.
• Insert the tip into the lounge’s plug and start pumping. It’s going to take you a while. Trust me. Then you’ll need to repeat for the pillow insert and the cylinder on the pillow insert around the thrusting mechanism.
• Look for the flap on the pillow insert that says “OPEN”. Peel the velcro flap up and insert 8 C batteries into the compartment. Locate the “On/Off” switch and switch it “On”. Insert a 12 volt battery into the wireless remote and a AA battery into the Futurotic® dong. Insert 2 AA batteries into the remote bullet vibe.
• Attach the Futurotic® dong to the thrusting mechanism.
• Push the pillow insert into the lounge.

And a video of me setting the Luv-U-Lounge up. Yes, I keep calling the Futurotic® dong a dildo. Technically, it would probably be considered a vibrator. However, I never put the AA battery in it to vibrate. Therefore, it’s just a dildo to me and I didn’t want to have to deflate it and re-inflate it just to fix that in the video. And please pardon the sucky audio. It was fine until I edited it with Windows Movie Maker :p

Disassembly:

You can either let it deflate on it’s own, or deflate it manually with the hand pump. Just attach the hose to the hole that says “deflate” and start pumping. Once it’s flat, roll it up and cram it in the pink storage bag. This may take some effort and skill.

Cleaning:

• Like I said before, keep a condom over the dong for easy cleaning, but always wash the dong after! You don’t want to leave any residue from the condom on it, especially if it’s a lubricated condom.
• As for the rest of the lounge, wipe it down with a Clorox wipe or something. Really easy to clean.

Lube: water-based or silicone-based is fine

Packaging: Raunchy. Glad this came when hubby wasn’t home so I could run it out to the dumpster.

Troubleshooting:

• If you’re having trouble getting the pillow insert into the cavity in the lounge, deflate it a bit, push it down in there and re-inflate it.
• If the Futurotic® dong isn’t thrusting well, you could be facing one of a few problems: you’re too tight and not relaxed enough, you’re not lubed up well enough, or it’s not hitting you at the right angle. Relax, lube yourself up more, or adjust the pillow in the cavity to a better angle/height.
• If you’re having trouble getting the dong attached, look for the little divot/groove/whatever thingies, match those up with the little protruding bits on the thrusting mechanism, push them in and turn the dong to lock it.
• If the thrusting mechanism isn’t thrusting, make sure the switch on the 8 C battery compartment is switched to the “On” position.

Is it phthalate-free?

Yes and no. The Futurotic® dong (TPR) is phthalate-free. At least, that’s what CalExotics told me. From the smell, I’d assume otherwise, but that chemical smell has dissipated. Still, be sure to always use a condom on it. TPR is porous and can harbor bacteria easily.

The PVC lounge is not. I’m guessing that’s the reason I got so light-headed and nauseous the first time I blew it up :p It doesn’t seem to smell anymore. I hate that it contains phthalates, but I don’t know what else they could’ve used to produce the lounge aside from PVC. I think that’s pretty much what all blow-up furniture is made of.

Summary: 4/5 I love this thing to death, but the phthalates and the raunchy packaging require me to knock off a star. Sorry. It may take a lot of time to set up and a lot of batteries, but I really do like the Luv-U-Lounge. If only PVC didn’t contain phthalates…

Review of Moko, the Liger Dildo from Bad Dragon

Yes, Bad Dragon finally has a feline dildo in production! I know ideas were floating around the forums like mad, so it’s great to see something being made now.

You can customize Bad Dragon toys in pretty much any way you can think of. There are four sizes, three levels of firmness, and whatever coloration your heart desires. You’ve also got the option of adding a cum tube, so Moko can squirt you with Bad Dragon’s Cum Lube.

My Moko is small, medium (5) firmness, and has the color option of Pride Streak. Keep in mind that my hand is tiny. I wear a size 4 wedding ring (which could still be sized down a bit), so sex toys I hold generally look huge.

Material

All Bad Dragon toys are pure silicone, meaning that they are phthalate-free, latex-free, and completely body-safe. Since it is non-porous, this toy can be shared, but should be sterilized before sharing, unless you plan on putting a condom over it. Beware that lubricated condoms are often lubricated with silicone-based lubricant, which can damage silicone sex toys.

Texture / Firmness

Most of Moko is fairly smooth, but there are a decent number of subtle bumps to represent barbs around the edge of the head and towards the base of the shaft. There is a well-defined urethra (which can collect cum and lube, so clean it carefully) and frenulum, below which is the engorged Corpus spongiosum (spongy tissue in the shaft that engorges with blood during arousal) with folds on either side leading towards the base of the shaft.

The whole toy is sort of a semi-gloss finish. It isn’t entirely matte, but it doesn’t have the drag of a glossy toy either. It has just a very subtle texture throughout that’s almost skin-like. The balls are smooth and plump, with no wrinkles or texture to represent hair or liger fur.

The image with the white background is mine. Unfortunately, my camera sucks at picking up details.

Since I chose my Moko in the medium (5) firmness, it’s soft without being floppy. I can easily bend it, and the tip isn’t pokey at all. Jabbing pointy toys at your cervix can be very uncomfortable, but the tip on mine is soft and gentle. Also, when females are aroused, the cervix will lift, elongating the vagina. That means less chance of poking it, for those who might be worried. If in doubt, just go for Bad Dragon’s softest firmness.

Lube

Use only water-based lube with Moko. Silicone-based lubes have been said to damage silicone sex toys. Bad Dragon does carry Cum Lube, which mimics the look and feel of cum, but the formula has parabens. Just a warning for those who may be sensitive to those ingredients.

Turning Japanese..I Think I’m Turning Japanese..I Really Think So

No, seriously, whenever I reference this dildo, I inadvertently call it “Moko-chan”. Why? Probably because the description on Bad Dragon’s product page has him working in a dojo.

My husband and I just moved into our house recently and, while I was trying to find Moko, I was basically muttering in Japanese.

“Moko-chan wa doko ni iru kashira…”

Yeah, wrong verb for “to be”. I should have said “aru” instead of “iru” because the dildo is not a living thing, but whatever. There you go. I’m just weird like that, alright?

Really, I’m not too much on the artwork for this toy, and I know some who have been turned off by it. There’s just something off about it, for me, and that’s coming from a tiger/raccoon/house cat. I know it really has nothing to do with the toy, but I remember seeing posts on Tumblr of people debating whether or not they thought the toy was attractive because of the art work.

No, I do not endorse the use of animals for sexual means. This is only fantasy.

Vaginal Use

Moko, in small, really isn’t the most filling of the Bad Dragon toys that I own. It’s also one of the least textured. I can feel the bumps that are supposed to represent feline barbs, but only just slightly. They really don’t offer much texture.

There is a slight curve to Moko but, with the medium density that I chose and its thickness, the curve doesn’t do much for my g-spot. I can still have a great time with Moko – I love grinding against the base and having the balls slap against me – but it’s not my ideal toy for g-spot stimulation.

I know pointy toys are scary to some, but trust me when I tell you that it doesn’t hurt. It’s very gentle on my cervix because I can squish the pointed tip with minimal effort. Also, if you have trouble inserting toys, even with lube, the taper of the tip will help Moko glide right in.

Anal Use

Moko makes an excellent anal toy. The pointed head makes it easy to insert, and it’s soft enough to be comfortable for me. I find that my tush prefers toys that have some give to them. Some may prefer, however, to opt for the hardest firmness to prevent Moko from bending too much and making insertion difficult.

Taken anally, I can’t feel those bumps (barbs) at all, only the head and the change in size in the shaft.

Cleaning

Warm water and soap, top rack dishwasher-safe, wipe with a 10% bleach solution, boil for 3 minutes, or even use baby bottle sterilizing mix.

I recommend boiling it or placing it in the dishwasher over other methods. There’s nooks and crannies where bodily fluids or lube may be tricky to get out.

Features

Colors: Anything you can imagine

Sizes: small, medium, large and extra large (A full size chart for all sizes is available on the product page.)

Density: Comes in soft, medium, or hard. Mine was medium, which means the tip is nice and soft. I know it looks pointy, but it’s fine.

Cum Tube: Available for medium, large, and extra large

Harness Compatible: It depends on what size you’d get, but mine certainly is.

Anal Safe: Yes.

Packaging

Moko came sealed in a plastic bag in a discreet box with a sample disc, lots of packing peanuts to keep everything safe and black tissue paper. The return address on the package said “Jan Mulders”. There was nothing to make it obvious what was in the package.

Opinion

Moko turned out to feel a lot smoother than I thought it would. The bumps to mimic feline barbs are just so subtle. If I remember correctly from the forums, though, making the barbs any more pronounced could have been an issue for molding the toy (air bubbles, issues getting it out of the mold, things like that). I think that was the main reason I was a little disappointed. I’m sure, though, as size goes up, so does the size of the bumps to mimic the barbs, and that should increase the stimulation felt from the texture. Of course, I haven’t had any experience with the larger ones, so that’s only a thought, not a statement. If you’re practicing to work up to taking larger toys, I think Moko would be a good starting point, due to the gentle taper.

Review of the Fukuoku 9000

After hearing so much about the Fukuoku 9000, I figured it was about time I tried it out myself. Thanks to Babeland, I got the Fukuoku 9000 a couple weeks ago. It’s actually purple. I had no idea it came in purple since the site only has pictures of the white/blue one. Through a little research, I found out there are loads of colors that the Fukuoku 9000 comes in. Babeland’s product page says “Color may vary”, so I guess it’s just the luck of the draw on which color you get.

Of course, being purple didn’t bother me. I actually have a thing for purple toys. Still, upon opening the package, the little sleeves smelled sort of rubbery. Strange… I washed them and they still smelled. I contemplated whether the smell could be from the leather pouch, but that just didn’t make sense. I was sure that the site said the Fukuoku 9000 sleeves are silicone. I checked. It did.

Next step? Contact Babeland’s livehelp. As always, Babeland was very helpful. They took my email down and would let me know as soon as the manufacturer got back to them about the material. I received an email a few days later that the manufacturer said for sure that it is silicone. By that time, the rubbery smell had dissipated.

What did I do while I waited for a reply? Research.

I really wanted to find out what “fukuoku” meant. Now, I’ve studied Japanese for 4 years and I have no idea what it means. :p I don’t even know if it’s made by a Japanese company (I doubt it since there’s some busty American bimbo on the package). In the process of trying to figure out what it could mean, I figured I’d just try to find out what the Japanese word for “fuck” is. I came up with 性交 (seikoo), which is a cleaner way of saying sexual intercourse than “fuck” is.

I also came across a couple interesting kanji (not real kanji!!!):

And there’s also a picture of a rather interesting book… Too bad I can’t see the hurigana to figure out what it says…

I’ve also found out the the Fukuoku line is an As Seen on TV product. How does that affect my opinion of it? Well, pretty much all of our As Seen on TV purchases have been junk, but I wanted to give this toy a fair trial.

As you can see from the picture, the Fukuoku 9000 attaches to the fingertip with two hinged flaps that adjust to pretty much any finger size. Rather pudgy finger->

The hinged flaps clamp tight enough to hold the Fukuoku on, but they’re gentle enough not to cut off the circulation to the tip of your finger.

It comes with three texture sleeves:

Clitoral Use: I can’t say that the textures do too much for my clit. I suppose a good part of it is because I’m just used to stronger vibes and more prominent textures. This little vibe leaves me wanting more, and not in a good way. It’s just not a strong enough vibe for me to get off easily with. I’m too spoiled by the turbo vibes of my Candy Vibe.

Vaginal Use: Tickling the labia with it would be fine (and does feel good), but be gentle if you decide to try to insert it. Probably wouldn’t be a good idea, but I guess you could try if you keep things shallow and gentle.

Nipple Use: Feels good. I prefer the bulls eye sleeve or the dotty starburst sleeve.

Penis Use: Well, I already knew that my hubby isn’t that big on vibes on his penis. Still, it’s enough to get a little moan out of him while he’s asleep (Yes, I like to strike at night like a succubus on the prowl). I used the one with the 3 lines for that.

Perineum Use: Good with any of the sleeves. Doesn’t really seem to make a difference which one you use. It’s all good. Definitely like it for perineum usage.

General Body Use: Nice for very sensitive areas of my body like my neck, spine, and shoulder blades. A whole hand of them would provide a very nice massage. I’m guessing that’s why Fukuoku made a glove.(<- Yes, I know that link doesn’t work, but that’s the link to the Fukuoku glove that Babeland has on their site here. I’ve been told they’re working to fix that.)

Anal Use: Feels good for rimming, but DO NOT insert the Fukuoku 9000 anally! I’m serious. You don’t want the sleeves coming off or, even worse, the entire Fukuoku 9000 coming off and getting lost in your tush.

Also included is a carrying case. (Always best to wash your cases before putting clean toys away in them. You never know what conditions your cases were made in.) It seems to be leather. Smells like it. There’s a loop on the back which makes me assume that it’s meant to be put on your belt. I think I might feel a bit silly carrying it around on my belt. Well, maybe you could carry it on your garter belt and flash someone with it.

Control: There’s one little switch on the side of the Fukuoku 9000 which can easily be turned on or off by the thumb on the same hand you’re using it on. There’s only one speed, so the switch is only good for “on” or “off”.

Vibration Level: 3/5 Average. Good for most, but it doesn’t come close to my beloved Candy Vibe. Now, that has a good buzz to it!

Noise Level: 2/5 It’s about the sound of a cell phone set to vibrate mode. You could probably hear it under the covers. Behind a closed door? Maybe. A little music could drown it out easily, though.

Batteries: Two watch batteries (comes with 4)

-Getting the batteries out: Just press down a bit and slide the door off the battery compartment. Replace batteries. Replace door. You’re ready to go!

Size: 1-1/2″ x 1″

Material: Silicone and hard plastic

Cleaning: Since the sleeves are silicone, you can boil them or place them in a 10% bleach solution and rinse thoroughly. Silicone can also be sterilized in the dishwasher, but good luck finding these if you throw them in your cycle. For the actual Fukuoku 9000, I’d say wipe it down with toy cleansing cloths or maybe a little alcohol.

Packaging: Darn busty bimbos. Shredded the minute I got it open. Raunchy packaging makes products look so cheap and trashy. Plus, you don’t want anyone you know finding that in the trash.

Pros: 3 textured silicone sleeves, 4 batteries provided, protective case provided, good amount of vibes, small and discreet (Just tell them it’s a temple massager for your migraines or something), good for stimulating numerous areas

Cons: trashy packaging, I’m too used to a stronger vibe to use this on my clit

Summary: 5/5 Other than the trashy packaging bothering me, it’s a nice little sex toy. For an As Seen on TV product, it’s gone past my expectations. And even though it can’t live up to the powerhouse that is my Candy Vibe, it’s still great for stimulation everywhere else. As far as I’m concerned, my husband can give me the finger (just as long as he has the Fukuoku 9000 on it ~_^)

Review of the “I Love Female Orgasm” Book, Authors: Dorian Solot & Marshall Miller

Yes, I do love female orgasm. What’s not to love? Ok, so maybe your orgasms are a little lack luster. That can be changed!

I Love Female Orgasm boasts itself as “an extraordinary orgasm guide”, and it definitely delivers. There’s probably a good chance you already know some of the things mentioned in this book, but I think everyone can learn at least a little something from it. I Love Female Orgasm is chock full of information, instructions, random interesting facts/stories/background information, and it’s very friendly and sex-positive. Those who don’t fit the straight female category will also be pleased to know that I Love Female Orgasm is friendly to all sexual orientations and tries to touch on information for everyone.

“One of the cool things about a subject like female orgasm is that it’s about a woman’s body, not her sexual orientation.”

Information You Can Expect:

How to have an orgasm during intercourse & why most women don’t

Although it does touch on positions that I already know are helpful for female orgasm during intercourse, there is an exercise designed to help the body learn to orgasm from penetration alone. Basically, get as close to orgasm as possible and then use a toy to thrust and complete orgasm. (There’s more to it, but you get the drift.) I’ve been working on this and I have seen some improvement. Still haven’t had an orgasm with just hubby penetrating me, but I will someday! (This section does have scribbly line drawings of naked couples. They’re fairly cartoonish and non-threatening, but I figure it’s best to let everyone know.)

Directions on finding your way to the G-spot and female ejaculation

Not only do the authors provide the history behind the discovery of the G-spot, they also include a diagram and detailed instructions on how to find it. If you’re curious about female ejaculation, this is a great section. I haven’t quite mastered this yet, but I tend to get impatient with wanting an orgasm. One of these days I’ll try to slow down and try out their techniques. Hopefully, if/when I do female ejaculate, I won’t make a huge mess. Hubby would definitely get on my case for that. He’s just like that.

Detailed advice on how to have an orgasm

This includes information on how those girly parts work, and there’s even some info on how to turn your man into a multi-orgasmic one! I think I’ll probably have to test that out on hubby sometime. There’s quite a bit of information on masturbation, including some common myths that possibly discourage women from doing it.

Advice for better oral sex

That means oral sex for you, ladies! It’s time our lips get some licking! This section addresses issues with oral sex self-esteem (Maybe you won’t let anyone near it because you think it smells or it’s ugly.), how to approach your partner for it, a detailed chart of positions and details, and lots more. (This section does have scribbly line drawings of naked couples. They’re fairly cartoonish and non-threatening, but I figure it’s best to let everyone know.)

Tips on surfing waves of multiple orgasms (even if you usually have just one)

There is nothing wrong with wanting more than one orgasm. However, attempting some of their techniques may wear you out or make you wake up with a pleasant post-ecstasy soreness the next morning. No, I’m not kidding. Sometimes my legs are sore the next morning if I have a really good orgasm session the day before.

Answers to your questions about vibrators, sex toys, piercings, and more

Vibrators and sex toys? (Vibrators are sex toys.)Yeah, I know plenty about those and there was nothing new. However, I knew nothing about piercings before reading this book. It’s interesting how getting a piercing can make certain areas more sensitive and orgasm-provoking, but I don’t think I’ll be getting any.

The real deal on orgasms for lesbian, bisexual, and queer women

I told you it was friendly to all sexual orientations. This section has information on inducing orgasms through female/female sex, challenges these women may face, interesting facts about female/female pairs in nature, a note on the general term “queer” and what it really means, plus some information and stories on transgendered individuals.

An entire chapter for men on how to turn her on and get her off, plus tips for partners in every chapter

Ok, more than just men can learn from this chapter, and the authors admit that. Being a great lover for a woman doesn’t mean that you have to be a man. And just because this section is directed at my partner, that doesn’t mean I can’t learn a thing or two. I definitely like the section on “Advanced Penisology”. If you’ve ever freaked out over your partner not keeping an erection (IE You thought it was your fault and you’re just not sexy enough), you need to read this. It’s not your fault, and it’s not theirs either.

Knocking at the back door

For those who are anally curious, I Love Female Orgasm offers some information and techniques for enjoying anal sex and achieving orgasm through it. This is a rather short section, but it does have some interesting information.

Preventing babies and bugs

Yes, there’s a section on various methods of birth control and safer sex practices. This includes an 8-page detailed chart on birth control methods and quite a bit more information on that subject and STDS. Very important stuff, people!

And more…

Yes, there’s much more that is included in this book, but I doubt that you want me jabbering on for too much longer.

What Bothers Me

The one thing that bothers me is that proper toy safety is glossed over.

Among the list of things to keep in mind while using anal sex toys, the authors made no mention of using condoms on porous toys. This quote bothers me in particular:

“Don’t use a toy for vaginal contact after it’s been in your anus unless you’ve washed it or put on a fresh condom.”

Porous toys like ones made with TPR can’t just be washed after anal use and then used for vaginal stimulation. Soft, porous materials can harbor and breed bacteria no matter how thoroughly you wash them. Also, not all toys can be fully sterilized; porous toys can’t. Always condom any toy that is not silicone, glass, metal, or solid plastic if you’re going to use it for vaginal play after anal play.

Also, material safety is very important when picking out a sex toy! Some sex toy materials can be toxic! The authors, however, did not include this in their “factors to consider when buying a vibe”. In their list were: shape, power, price, sound, color and style. Apparently safety isn’t a factor to be considered.

What I Love

I Love Female Orgasm is as entertaining as it is informational. I am not a reader. Unless something has interesting facts or some cheery quirk to it, I’ll probably never get past the first few sentences. I have a tiny attention span like that; I just don’t like to sit down and dedicate my time to one thing (multi-tasker) unless I’m really into it.

Even though I thought I knew a lot, this book still had quite a few tricks up it’s sleeves for me. There’s some great information on these pages. Plus, there are plenty of stories, facts, exercises for solo play/couples play. There’s little bubbles of stories and facts on almost every page. I love that! I have a short attention span, ok? One of my favorite bubbles talks about a sex ed party trick. Blow up two regular latex condoms, tie them off, put water-based lube on one and oil-based lube on the other. Now jabber and go on for a while and wait for the condom balloon with the oil-based lube on it to pop and scare the bajeebies out of everyone!

Also, the great thing about this book is, not only are you helping yourself, but you’re also helping other women! Because Dorian Solot is a breast cancer survivor, 10% of the book royalties are donated Breast Cancer Action. That means more possible birthdays for these women and more possibly awesome orgasms!

Rating: 4.5/5 I still think more attention should have been paid to sex toy safety, but I love I Love Female Orgasm (That was kind of redundant… Oh well!) Honestly, this book is the sex ed class I wish I had in middle school. I Love Female Orgasm has all you’ll ever need to know about female orgasm and more! It’s definitely a must-have for the bookshelf!

Review of the Incoqnito Necktie

By now, it should be no secret that I love ties. This Incoqnito Necktie is no exception. I’d been ogling it since Incoqnito debuted it and just recently received the chance to review it. Naturally, I snapped it right up.

The Incoqnito Necktie is a designed to be a discreet and luxurious collar and leash. If you want to take your pet out for the evening but don’t want anyone to know about that part of your relationship, the Incoqnito Necktie is a great way to keep that hush-hush while keeping your pet looking sharp and behaving properly.

It’s also good for one of these numbers —–>

Yanking a guy by his necktie to smooch him up is classic. Just be sure you grab the entire tie and don’t choke him!

To make getting a grip on the Incoqnito Necktie a little easier, a rather long strap has been sewn to the back to act as a handle so your hand doesn’t just slip off the tie.

For those who have never been able to figure out how to tie a tie (like hubby, whose ties I have to tie for him), the Incoqnito Necktie is definitely for you! Just slide the metal knot down, slip your head through the loop, and slide the knot back up. It looks just like a regular tie under a button-down except for the shiny metal.

This is what it looks like on me. I rather like it with my green button-down, but that’s just me. No, I have no pictures of hubby wearing it. He refuses to wear ties unless he absolutely has to. He says they’re nooses and won’t go near them. I, however, collect them. Strange couple, no? I guess it’s just as well. I’m the pet anyway. I suppose it makes more sense that I wear it and that he refuses it.

If you’re going to wear it as a collar and leash, the Incoqnito Necktie has flaps in the collar that fold out to make it bigger (See those dotted lines? That’s where the flaps fold). I know what you’re thinking; “What’s the point of that?”. Well, the more surface area to absorb tension, the less pressure. That means your neck won’t be sore the next day from your master yanking you around. They do make it much more comfortable. Also, you can see how the hand is inserted into the loop in the back of the tie in the picture. Basic Details

Material: Polyester and rayon, sterling silver or rose gold

Cleaning: You can wipe any fingerprints or smudges off of the metal with a soft cloth. The Incoqnito Necktie as a whole is dry clean only, though.

Total length: 24"

Neck diameter: 10" – 26"

Packaging: The Incoqnito Necktie comes in a very nice black box suitable for gift giving. It’s very sturdy and should hold up to a lifetime of use, if you decide to store your Incoqnito Necktie in it. I would advise you to do so. Luxuries ties deserve special care. There’s also a set of instructions included in the packaging.

“Usage

Flip the inner collar outward for more comfort around the neck. Slide the metal tie for desired tightness. Place one hand in handle for sensual control of your partner.”

Rating: 5/5 As a tie connoisseur, I must say the Incoqnito Necktie is quite lovely and innovative. Very classy, and very kinky. However, I do sort of miss the feel of traditional silk. I can see why polyester and rayon were used, though. Silk isn’t really meant to be handled much. The natural oils from human skin soil it easily.